All The Shit I’m Saying NO To So I Can Relax And Grow Rich

Did you have a happy Halloween?

Ours was low key this year.

Rain went trick or treating with friends while Zak and I stayed at home with Ollie and Bogie and watched the last episode of the new HBO documentary I’m Not a Monster: The Lois Riess Murders.

Have you seen it?

It was kinda wild, I’m not gonna lie.

And thennnn… we watched the first episode of This is the Zodiac Speaking on Netflix.

I can’t.

I know this story but this is an entirely different side of it.

If you’re into true crime, you’ll love it.

If you’re not… then maybe skip it and watch… IDK… something else.

On Saturday, we celebrated Zak’s birthday with friends at this delish restaurant, BLVD, in LA.

It was small, intimate, and a total vibe.

We’ve been pretty low-key lately.

Maybe it’s the weather or the season change?

I feel the need to breathe into what I’m already creating, take care of mySELF, and I don’t know… relax and grow rich. : )

I think I’m in my No Era.

And that’s what I wanna talk about today…

Keep reading and see if you’re with me!

Cynthia

The Power of Saying NO

This week I was vexting my friend, Anne.

(That’s voice texting if you’re new here.)

She hosted Friendsgiving last year and is determined to not do that shit again.

She was telling me about how there was things she just didn’t want to do anymore.

Things she was now saying “no” to that before she would have for sure said “yes” to.

And I HEARD that.

So, naturally, I started thinking about all the things that I no longer want to do.

Things I’m saying no to.

It’s a long list.

Here are a few of the things…

• People pleasing
• Caring what other people think (been in this era a long time now and I don’t see any signs of that changing)
• Being around people that don’t feed my soul just because I have other friends (or family) that want to be around them. Go ahead. I’ll stay home.
• Going out just for the sake of “going out”
• Drinking – I know, it’s wild but I’m doing a detox. Not sure how long but when it’s over, it will be over and I’ll know it. Thinking it will be 90 days or so.
• Prioritizing anything over my health. I’m just not gonna do it. It’s the most important thing and I’m treating it that way.

What else…

• Shrinking so others feel more comfortable around me. This week another girlfriend had some MAJOR wins in her life and business and she said to me… “Shrink for no one!” followed up by… “Jump higher bitches!” I love her.
• Anything that’s a distraction from my future dreams
• Crowds
• Rushing from one thing to the next… it’s slow down season lovelies!
• Not trusting my gut (I can’t tell you how many times I’ve regretted not trusting mySELF. And not ONE time have I ever said, “I wish I hadn’t listened to my gut.” Not. One.)
• Feeling guilty about asking for help. We all need it. It doesn’t mean you’re weak.

I could go on but you get the idea.

You see… what I’ve come to know over the past several years is that the power of saying no is about clarity.

It’s about knowing who you want to be and choosing only the things that bring you closer to that version of yourSELF.

I am so clear on who my Future Self is that I’m simply saying no to anything she wouldn’t do.

And by doing that, I’m becoming her faster and faster.

That makes my head spin with excitement!

Think about it: Who is the version of you that’s living that rich, fulfilling, SELF Made life?

And the next time you’re faced with a decision, ask yourself: “Does this serve the person I’m becoming?”

If the answer isn’t a full-body FUCK YES, then it’s a no.

And that’s okay.

In fact, Your future self will thank you for it.

Now… I know you might be thinking… “yeah Cynthia but saying no makes me feel icky! Like I’m disappointing people or like I’m missing out”.

Who cares and you’re not.

But while we’re talking about it, let me go off on this for a minute…

It’s ok for people to be disappointed.

That’s not about you.

It’s about them being attached to an outcome that now isn’t going to happen.

They’re not going to melt away like the Wicked Witch in the Wizard of Oz. They’ll be fine.

They’ll either see this as an opportunity to support your needs and wants (even if they wanted something different) OR they’ll wallow around in their own drama for a good while (and that’s ok too).

Let them be who they need to be and not who I want them to be.

Saying no isn’t negative. It’s powerful.

It’s you taking control of your time, your energy, and your own MF future. (Hi, kind of important.)

By saying no to what doesn’t serve you, you’re making space for the things that do.

For deep work, creativity, and moments that inspire and awe you.

For the people who matter and the experiences that you’ll talk about in your rocking chair one day.

THIS is how you create a life where you can relax and grow rich, not just with money, but with time and joy and meaning.

Remember… being SELF Made is not about how many things you can juggle; it’s about knowing which balls to drop so you can keep catching the ones that matter.

It’s about choosing you, choosing your future, and choosing to live a life that aligns with what you actually want—not what others think you should do or what looks good on paper.

So, the next time you feel that urge to say yes just because you “should”, pause.

Remember who you’re becoming.

Remember what it means to be SELF Made.

And choose you.

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